Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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