Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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