do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
