maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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