Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
