My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
