One girl and one boy is just not enough.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
