People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
