ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
My liver just had a heart attack.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
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