Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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