wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
