No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
