Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
