So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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