brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Randomize
