I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
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he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
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