And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize