no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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