He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
my shit smells like andre
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
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