I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
