dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
