Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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