I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
