if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
