at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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