The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
