take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
