My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
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