i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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