just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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