3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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