Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
