Kiss
Puke
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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