she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
