I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
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