Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
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