You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Why is there bacon in the couch?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
