I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
