I cockslap morals
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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