I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
