the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
