I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
