toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
