If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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