so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
