i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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