yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
