Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
