wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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