and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
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